While I am interested, more then I should be, about how people think and why they do the things they do — I’m more interested in what my puppy thinks. There was a time when I never gave it a second thought. But then that changed. It changed once I saw how excited my puppy would get over a ball. Just a small yellow ball. She will bring the ball to me, place it at my feet, and then stare at me with what appears to be excitement in her eyes and a swing in her tail. I grab the ball and she goes nuts. Waiting for me to throw it. And when I do, she runs after it full speed just to bring it right back so we can do it again. To my puppy, this ball is the world to her — literally, it appears to be the only thing in the world for her at the moment. That is until she decides she’s done, then it has no value what so ever. That’s when I can hold up the ball to her and she looks at my like, “Call the cops, I don’t give a fuck.”
Sometimes, she picks up something in her mouth that she should not have and she will try to hide it from me. Pretends she doesn’t have anything. I don’t even have to say anything. I’ll just see her sneaking around and I’ll say, “Hey! What have you got? Drop it!” And she opens her mouth slowly and lets it fall out and looks at me as if to say, “What? I don’t have anything.” But this shows to me she knows the difference between right and wrong and she knows she’s been caught.
If she needs something from me she has a few choices. Sometimes she will bark to get my attention (especially if I appear to be ignoring her). Other times she will just jump up against me with her front paws to let me know she is there and wants something. And yet there are times where I will find her, in the other room, sitting in front of an empty food bowl, waiting for me to fill it. I’m not sure why she doesn’t bark to let me know she needs food — maybe it’s because she knows an empty bowl will get filled eventually.
But does she have a concept of time? She gets just as excited to see me when I’m gone 5 minutes or when I’m gone 5 days.
I’ve also seen, and heard, her dream. Sometimes she barks, quietly or loudly, sometimes she moves her feet as if she is running. Is she dreaming about chasing a ball? Does she know she is dreaming? Or does it seem like real life?
I’ve read/heard that dogs never grow out of the “human toddler” stage, and I get that. I see that. Basic understanding of her world, but still not smart enough to know that I can hear her go into the kitchen (where she is not supposed to be) and be surprised when I yell, “Out of the kitchen!”
But what is she thinking? She obviously knows some right from wrong, but does she have morals? Does she worry about getting lost outside and not finding her way home? Is she afraid of getting hurt? Or killed? Does she even know she is going to die someday? Does she know she is growing old? Does she have a god? Am I her god?
What if, deep down, people are the same way? Where is my ball? Where is that one thing that, when placed at my feet, makes my eyes light up with excitement — so much excitement that I feel like I’m going to explode? And if I find it, will I, just as fast, loose interest in it?
I know some things are wrong, or bad for me, but I do them anyway.
I’m not always conscious of the passage of time.
I speak when I need somethings, but sometimes I’ll just wait without making a sound.
And I sometimes wonder, what does my puppy think?